Toilet paper does not grow on trees.
In the end, everbody eventually uses too much toilet paper.
The overuse of toilet paper is an addiction. One starts small, perhaps one sheet a day, then they find themselves using two sheets, three sheets, and soon find themselves using rolls of toilet paper every day.
This addiction is caused by certain individuals dependence on chemicals used in the manufacture of toilet paper. They do not knowingly become addicted, it just happens.
Improper diet can cause an increased need (both physical and psychological) for more and more toilet paper. If you doubt this, attempt a little experiment. The three day prune diet will convince you of this.
July 4th, 1913, Jonathan P. Ingleston of The Toilet Paper Preservation Society released the first commercial version of Jonathan's Chemical Free Bathroom Tissue. The addicted individual should use this alternative to "normal" toilet paper.
The Society goes along with the fact that toilet paper has become almost a needed item in most parts of the world. The goals of The Society in regards to toilet paper are simple:
- Limit it's usage.
- Endorses the concept of reusable toilet paper.
- Add a small luxury tax to toilet paper, perhaps $5.00 per roll, with all proceeds from this to go to the Toilet Paper Preservation Society.
- Encourage constipation among all citizens of the world.
- Ban the use of laxatives.
All individuals are welcome to become members of this society.
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